SanLuisObispo.com: Living

Linda Lewis Griffith: Healing grudges

Sun, 30 Nov 2008 23:02 PST

So Hillary Clinton will be our next secretary of state. The very person who hurled vicious epithets at Barack Obama for months now stands beside him in the videos, beaming from ear to ear, pledging complete cooperation and dutiful support.

While some folks might view this instantaneous 180 with skepticism, as merely the game of politics being played out on the evening news, I take a different stand. I see this as a wonderful example of burying the hatchet, of letting past hurts flow out with the tides, of quickly healing grudges and moving on with their respective lives.

Contrast this behavior to that of people who hold grudges against family members or former friends for decades without budging one inch. I know clans in which brothers haven’t spoken to each other in years. I’ve met women who have disowned their parents, former college roommates who look the opposite way when they encounter each other on the sidewalk, neighbors who scowl and look straight ahead when they drive by someone who lives two doors away. I even overheard one high-functioning person boast, “My family holds grudges forever.”

A day for thanks, a day for drama

Sun, 23 Nov 2008 22:55 PST

By Linda Lewis Griffith -- I happen to love Thanksgiving. I savor the seasonal flavors of turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes and pumpkin pie. I decorate the table in fall leaves and gourds. I’m energized by visiting loved ones, many of whom I haven’t seen in several months.

Even so, there’s an underlying tension whenever there’s a large family gathering. Certain personalities tend to be bossy. Others never lift a finger to help. One member keeps you walking on eggshells, another watches football all afternoon. Petty jealousies rise up like freshly baked biscuits. Tempers ignite faster than the log in the fireplace.

Inherently messy

Holiday gift ideas for those for the love of art

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:09 PST

By Lee Sutter -- Needles are clicking, pottery wheels spinning, lathes whirling, torches flaming, kilns glowing, glass melting and scissors snipping as local crafters get ready for the CraftArt Market.

And that’s just a few of the activities local artists and crafters are immersed in for this annual event that kicks off Friday at the San Luis Obispo Art Center.

Not just anyone can show and sell their works at this competitive event, said Karen Kile, the center’s executive director.

12 TIMES THE HOLIDAY CHEER

Sat, 22 Nov 2008 17:06 PST

By Sarah Linn -- 1 MUSIC AT THE MISSION

Kick off the holiday season today with a concert at San Luis Obispo’s historic mission.

The San Luis Obispo Symphony Chamber Orchestra welcomes winter with works by Gustav Holst, Antonio Vivaldi and Johann Sebastian Bach. The concert opens with Arcangelo Corelli’s “Christmas Concerto.”

SHARE YOUR HOLIDAY RECIPES AND TRADITIONS

Fri, 21 Nov 2008 14:49 PST

We’re seeking your favorite holiday tradition and what it means to you — a recipe, decorations, carols or activity. Be sure to include your name, address and telephone number. We’ll highlight some of your recipes and traditions in an upcoming issue of our Sunday Central Coast Living section and on SanLuisObispo.com.

The deadline for submissions is Dec. 5.

E-mail us at traditions@thetribunenews.com; write c/o Traditions, The Tribune, P.O. Box 112, San Luis Obispo, 93406; or fax submissions to 781-7905

Home for the holidays coloring contest

Thu, 20 Nov 2008 14:29 PST

As the saying goes, there’s no place like home for the holidays. However, some homes could use some holiday spirit.

Get out the markers, crayons, scissors, fabric, paper and glitter and give this cozy cottage a brand-new look.

We’ll print our favorites in the Dec. 21 issue of Central Coast Living.

Parents decision to provide phones for kids should include a clear set of boundaries

Mon, 17 Nov 2008 08:33 PST

By Linda Lewis Griffith -- Cell phones are a marvelous invention. They’re perfect for keeping in touch when we’re away from home, calling for help in an emergency or conducting business during off hours.

Kids and cell phones are another matter. They can unleash untold stress and conflict within the household. Parents complain that their teens text message during dinner.

Cell phone bills balloon to astronomical amounts. Homework is interrupted every 30 seconds. Even vacations are a battle as folks plead with their youngsters to put down their Razrs and interact with the family.

Setting cell phone limits; can they hear you now?

Mon, 17 Nov 2008 08:36 PST

• Decide on cell phone policies. How do you want cell phones managed in your home? No interruptions during dinner? No texting during homework? Full attention when you’re having a conversation? Identify the desired behaviors, then express them in clear and concise words.

• Work with your partner. Make sure all adults are on board with the desired policies. Things won’t work if there’s dissention in the ranks.

• Maintain an alliance with your children. Let kids know how much you love them. You’re not establishing rules to be mean. You want them to be connected to their friends. You may even be willing to negotiate on some issues. Work together as a team to create the best policies for your family.

Design Notebook: How to keep the home fires burning efficiently, beautifully

Thu, 02 Oct 2008 17:06 PDT

By Rebecca Juretic -- Fall may still bring on a heat wave or two, but it those in the know are already thinking about fireplaces.

Fireplace companies are heading into their busiest season. So, according to John Ewan, owner of San Luis Obispo’s Pacific Energy Co., if you’d like to cozy up to a revamped hearth over the holidays, now is the time to get the ball rolling.

“Typically, the lead time is about three weeks out, but this time of year as winter approaches we’ll hit six weeks,” he said.

Backyard refuge is a gathering place

Thu, 02 Oct 2008 17:06 PDT

By Sharon Crawford -- Rather than scaling downward at retirement, Robert and Diane Scumacher wanted a larger house to accommodate their three-generation family gatherings. Theirs was the very first house built in a new Nipomo development.

In addition to the spacious house, the site appealed to them because the backyard is contiguous with a green space — a reserved swath of land that will remain in its natural state. Front-yard landscaping was installed when the house was completed nine years ago. The rest of the half-acre lot was bare except for several native live oak trees that had been preserved in the side and backyards.

The Scumachers intended to create their garden themselves, but conceptualizing a complete garden plan can be daunting, even for gardeners as experienced as they are. They wisely decided to build their garden in small stages. Their first priority was to screen their patio from a new neighboring house. Now, that house is barely visible through a hedge of pittosporum and escallonia.

Master Gardener: Don’t roll up your sleeves when removing poison oak

Thu, 02 Oct 2008 17:06 PDT

By Ann Dozier -- Q: My husband (who is not allergic to poison oak) is going to clear some land for our new vegetable garden. How can we get rid of the poison oak permanently?

A: Eradicating poison oak will not be easy, as roots spread underground. Hand pulling or removal with a shovel or pick should be done when soil is damp and whole roots can be dug out. Working in dry ground usually leaves roots that will eventually re-sprout. The same problem exists with bulldozing or brushraking. Repeated plowing or mowing, good seedbed preparation, and planting of cultivated crops may control infestations. If practical, grazing by sheep or goats can be effective. Burning is not recommended, as the smoke can cause severe respiratory irritation.

People with immunity to poison oak can tackle removal, but they should wear protective clothing, including cloth gloves over plastic gloves. All clothing (including shoes) should be washed thoroughly after contact with plants. Immediately wash skin exposed to plant oils with rubbing alcohol and rinse with abundant cool water.

Linda Lewis Griffith: The quest for success

Sun, 28 Sep 2008 23:37 PDT

By Linda Lewis Griffith -- We all want to see our children succeed. We want to help them thrive in school. We want them to develop skills that foster independence, instill character and increase the likelihood of a productive adulthood.

But sometimes this desire goes terribly awry. Parents harbor expectations for their youngsters that are decidedly beyond the kids’ interests or innate abilities. These well-meaning moms and dads may invest tens of thousands of dollars and countless hours driving their children to lessons or researching appropriate programs under the guise that it’s “helping the kids.” They then feel angry and resentful when youngsters fail to follow the prescribed path.

Two groups of parents

Climbing Half Dome

Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:26 PDT

By Andrew Carter -- The craziness of climbing Half Dome hits me at Nevada Falls. Here my son William and I join the main trail coming up from Yosemite Valley. We’ve hiked 30 miles to get here, starting two and a half days ago at Wawona.

But the mass of humanity at Nevada Falls started their hikes just two hours ago in Yosemite Valley. These day hikers have climbed 1,900 feet in 2-1/2 miles to get here.

We all have 4-1/2 miles and 2,900 feet more to climb to reach the top.

Capturing Landmarks

Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:27 PDT

By Patrick S. Pemberton -- It doesn’t matter how many painters depict Morro Rock, local artists say — each work of art will be different.

That’s because there are so many variables: the painting style, the angle the artist chooses, the fog, the light.

“The time of day is pretty critical,” said Dotty Hawthorne, a San Luis Obispo painter participating in this year’s Plein Air Festival.

Ronald Reagan left his mark on the state, SLO County

Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:27 PDT

By Ronald Reagan left his mark on the state, SLO County -- His first step onto the national political stage was stumping for Barry Goldwater’s presidential run in 1964. Then, two years later, Ronald Reagan did what Richard Nixon could not: He unseated Edmund G. “Pat” Brown as governor of California.

It takes a better political carpenter than me to identify what planks are different in the Nixon-Reagan gubernatorial platforms.

Their biggest differences were not their ideology but their charisma. Nixon always seemed to be working the angles, scrabbling for an advantage. Reagan never appeared he was working that hard.

The right couch can make the room and the house

Fri, 26 Sep 2008 07:24 PDT

By Rebecca Juretic -- Few pieces of furniture receive as much use and abuse as the sofa. Choose the right one and it becomes the best seat in the house. Choose wrong, and it gets pawned off on a college student, some-one’s bachelor pad, or worse — it gets hauled to the curb.

So what separates the good, bad and the ugly in the sofa world? According to Guntug Yilmaz, it’s all a matter of personal preference.

Yilmaz is the owner of Couch Potato, a San Luis Obispo furniture store specializing in — you guessed it —couches. He believes that tastes in couches are so wide-ranging, customization is the best way to avoid a sofa snafu.

Sustainable building in home design: Using eco-friendly methods to minimize energy use

Fri, 26 Sep 2008 07:24 PDT

By Written by Rebecca Juretic -- Long before eco-consciousness was trendy, Steve and Laurie Weymann were studying sustainable building. Fifteen years ago, they took a course in permaculture, which embraces both sustainable agriculture and an eco-friendly lifestyle.

An idea sparked and finally manifested in 2002 when they purchased nearly 24 acres in Atascadero. Their original intent was to build an eco-friendly bed and breakfast.

“We wanted to do a green, sustainable B&B so that people could see that you can have a comfortable, aesthetically pleasing space and still build with green principles,” said Laurie.

Thu, 25 Sep 2008 17:06 PDT

By Dale Norrington -- Q: Given current economic and gasoline conditions, maybe a return to Victory Gardening is in order. Can vegetables be planted during autumn for winter harvest on the Central Coast?

—Devin Langley, San Luis Obispo

A: Autumn’s approach might typically include ripening pumpkins and harvesting rewards of summer labor and yes, it can also be planting time for fresh-picked produce later in autumn and on into the winter. Successful vegetable gardening is intimately related to climate, weather, and season.

Pet Tales: A short but full life for this cat

Mon, 22 Sep 2008 08:25 PDT

By Jennifer VanderSmith -- My first cat, which my parents had before I was born, was named L. S. I found out when I was much older what the initials stood for. Susan Ayres sent me the story of her beloved pound kitty who earned the same name during her short life:

“She was the littlest, sickest kitty at the pound, mucus coming from her nose and runny eyes—she seemed miserable. I decided to adopt her with the condition that she be treated with antibiotics, as I still had two other cats at home.

“After a few days I picked her up to take her to her first vet appointment—she stayed overnight, was spayed and given a clean bill of health. When I picked her up she weighed a whopping 1.8 pounds. She was tiny!

Weighty matters

Sun, 21 Sep 2008 23:34 PDT

By Linda Lewis Griffith -- Your 14-year-old daughter has a weight problem. Her belly fat rolls over the top of her jeans. Her tops no longer button in the middle. She seldom does anything physical and spends hours every day texting her friends. When you mention your concerns she snaps: “It’s my body. Leave me alone.” Then she nonchalantly takes another handful of chips.

Many parents are justifiably concerned about their children’s excessive weight. According to the National Center for Health Statistics 17 percent of all boys and girls are overweight— a number that has tripled since 1980. An additional 15 percent of kids are considered “at risk” for becoming overweight.

Any parent who’s tried it will tell you that nagging kids about their eating habits doesn’t help. In fact, it usually makes things worse. As a result, most well-meaning folks toss up their hands in despair in their attempts to change their youngsters’ behavior.